Anyway -- I know she'll have fun in Portugal but she will be missed!
Friday, September 11, 2009
Bye-Bye Grandma
Today my Mom left for Portugal on vacation. While I'm excited for her I can't help but admit that I'm sad for me and Carly. Mom will be gone for 8 days and we'll miss her being around! It's been so special to hang around with her so much since Carly's been born. She's been so much fun to have around. Not just because she's so helpful -- just having her near makes me feel comfortable and at ease. I've always been an independant person. I've never been the "I want my Mommy" type, but since the birth of my first child I am certainly more attached to my Mom! Funny, eh?
Anyway -- I know she'll have fun in Portugal but she will be missed!
Anyway -- I know she'll have fun in Portugal but she will be missed!
Waking Baby
MVI_7502
Originally uploaded by Jessiedc22
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Thursday, September 3, 2009
"Carly, look what Mommy can do"
Today Mom and I went out for a bit with Carly. We got some breakfast at Panera and then we stopped at TJ Max. I thought I'd just TRY to put on real jeans. I knew I wasn't going to be the svelt size 12 that I once was but I was ready to wear jeans again! You know, the real ones without the elastic waist. So we gathered about 9 pair of jeans and huffed it to the dressing room. I tried on the first pair of 14s and WOW they fit.
So pumped was I!!! I leaned over to my little monkey and I said, "Carly, look what Mommy can do! Button, Zip, Button, Zip, Button, Zip!"
Sweet!
So pumped was I!!! I leaned over to my little monkey and I said, "Carly, look what Mommy can do! Button, Zip, Button, Zip, Button, Zip!"
Sweet!
Yay for us
We've had 2 really good days. Lost of on-schedule eating and lots of nice sleeping. Mommy feels rejuvenated and baby must feel better --and I know that because her mood is better. The bedtime is still midnight but that's because she eats at midnight...so I'm not sure how to curve that ... we are up earlier though. Yesterday was 7a.m. and today was 9:30am. Both night she was asleep at midnight. Maybe that's because we're up until midnight?
Stop!
All this over analyzing is giving me a head ache. We'll just have to take it day by day to see how it works out. For now -- I'm basking in the glory of having a mostly happy infant. =)
Stop!
All this over analyzing is giving me a head ache. We'll just have to take it day by day to see how it works out. For now -- I'm basking in the glory of having a mostly happy infant. =)
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
A "Do Over"
Taking care of your own newborn is one of the hardest yet wonderful things I've ever done, to say the least. It's something that you can't train for yet so much energy is required for it. Last night I was at a breaking point. I cried and I felt hopeless but I pushed through and today I feel renewed. Carly and I made a secret pact - a "Do Over". Today begins our NEW plan.
One of the hardest parts of Motherhood for me right now is the disorganization. I'm very used to having things organized. I know where things are, how to get to them, when things are happening, why, why not, and how to avoid most pitfalls. After all, that is a what I do for a living. Holly and I have a saying, "I Plan Shit". That's me. That WAS me. Now that I've got Carly my saying is, "Shit! Where's my plan???"
Scheduling - newborns don't have SCHEDULES. They just are who they are and need what they need when they need it. That's fine but keeping up with their heavy demands can be a challenge on little sleep.
Sleep - it's rare, not taken all at once but instead in little blips throughout the day, and when you're sleeping your not really sleeping. You're sleeping with one eye open. Lack of sleep = cranky Mommy
Personal Time - None. I'm not sure about you but I can't go #2 when someone is wailing in the next room. So being able to do the tiniest of things alone is always up in the air. This would of course not be a problem if I could schedule my #2s but I cannot (see "Scheduling")
Spouse Time - Again, not something you can plan. You begin to have Mommy & Daddy time and inevitably the baby cries. Or the baby is fine all day but chooses to cry from the time that Daddy walks in the door until the time that Daddy had to go to bed. Which brings me to guilt...
Guilt - This I feel several times a week, particularly when Carly has a bad day. While I know that having a child was a mutual agreement between Eric and I - I also know that Eric needed a lot of coaxing. He loves Carly, that's not the issue, but this newborn phase is not his favorite. I can't help but feel like on some level he resents me for having gotten him in to this in the first place. Has he said that? No. But do I think he's thankful he gets to go to work every day instead of stay home with an unpredictable crying little stinker? Yes. Shoot! I wish I could go to work some days! The good news is that Eric continues to promise me that he's doesn't hate me for getting him in to this mess and that he knows that we'll get through this tough time together. He has also very generously asked me several times if I want him to get a vasectomy. LOL
Joy - With all these challenges there is also an incredible sense of joy in being a parent. I would not want to live without my little cranky monster monkey. She's the fruit of my womb. She's healthy and adorable. I could kiss her soft cheeks until my lips went raw. Not only that, she smells good and she looks REALLY cute in pink. But sometimes you just need a "Do Over"
THE "DO-OVER"
We're having a "do-over" day! I've got to try and get some control over life. Carly and I are starting a new plan! We wake up at 7a.m. instead of 11a.m. From now on, I'm going to be much more vigilant about watching the clock. She eats a full meal and then she has to wait 2.5 to 3 hours to eat again. (No more mid-meal snacking to lull her cries -- it's just not good for any of us!) She takes a few mid-day naps and I nap with her. This, hopefully, will get her bedtime down from midnight to 10pm (ish). During the day she'll get a bath, we'll walk, maybe run 1 errand, and pick up the house a little. I'm going to work on being more conscious about the foods I eat so I'm not loading her up with spicy, gassy foods.
So far it's worked. I feel good and refreshed. She's had a great day -- no crazy crying for no reason. She's napping now and I've got a little me-time but I'm going to lay down in a few minutes.
Sometimes you just need a "Do Over" dammit!
One of the hardest parts of Motherhood for me right now is the disorganization. I'm very used to having things organized. I know where things are, how to get to them, when things are happening, why, why not, and how to avoid most pitfalls. After all, that is a what I do for a living. Holly and I have a saying, "I Plan Shit". That's me. That WAS me. Now that I've got Carly my saying is, "Shit! Where's my plan???"
Scheduling - newborns don't have SCHEDULES. They just are who they are and need what they need when they need it. That's fine but keeping up with their heavy demands can be a challenge on little sleep.
Sleep - it's rare, not taken all at once but instead in little blips throughout the day, and when you're sleeping your not really sleeping. You're sleeping with one eye open. Lack of sleep = cranky Mommy
Personal Time - None. I'm not sure about you but I can't go #2 when someone is wailing in the next room. So being able to do the tiniest of things alone is always up in the air. This would of course not be a problem if I could schedule my #2s but I cannot (see "Scheduling")
Spouse Time - Again, not something you can plan. You begin to have Mommy & Daddy time and inevitably the baby cries. Or the baby is fine all day but chooses to cry from the time that Daddy walks in the door until the time that Daddy had to go to bed. Which brings me to guilt...
Guilt - This I feel several times a week, particularly when Carly has a bad day. While I know that having a child was a mutual agreement between Eric and I - I also know that Eric needed a lot of coaxing. He loves Carly, that's not the issue, but this newborn phase is not his favorite. I can't help but feel like on some level he resents me for having gotten him in to this in the first place. Has he said that? No. But do I think he's thankful he gets to go to work every day instead of stay home with an unpredictable crying little stinker? Yes. Shoot! I wish I could go to work some days! The good news is that Eric continues to promise me that he's doesn't hate me for getting him in to this mess and that he knows that we'll get through this tough time together. He has also very generously asked me several times if I want him to get a vasectomy. LOL
Joy - With all these challenges there is also an incredible sense of joy in being a parent. I would not want to live without my little cranky monster monkey. She's the fruit of my womb. She's healthy and adorable. I could kiss her soft cheeks until my lips went raw. Not only that, she smells good and she looks REALLY cute in pink. But sometimes you just need a "Do Over"
THE "DO-OVER"
We're having a "do-over" day! I've got to try and get some control over life. Carly and I are starting a new plan! We wake up at 7a.m. instead of 11a.m. From now on, I'm going to be much more vigilant about watching the clock. She eats a full meal and then she has to wait 2.5 to 3 hours to eat again. (No more mid-meal snacking to lull her cries -- it's just not good for any of us!) She takes a few mid-day naps and I nap with her. This, hopefully, will get her bedtime down from midnight to 10pm (ish). During the day she'll get a bath, we'll walk, maybe run 1 errand, and pick up the house a little. I'm going to work on being more conscious about the foods I eat so I'm not loading her up with spicy, gassy foods.
So far it's worked. I feel good and refreshed. She's had a great day -- no crazy crying for no reason. She's napping now and I've got a little me-time but I'm going to lay down in a few minutes.
Sometimes you just need a "Do Over" dammit!
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Massage
I had my first massage since Carly was born. It was great! I also had one of my first expiriences leaving Carly with someone (Holly) while also leaving the compound long enough for her to need a bottle. On one hand it was great, and freeing, but on the other hand it felt strange to leave her behind. Holly was good to me though and sent me a few pictures of Carly playing happily which helped.
The massage was great and much needed. It was firmer than I usually like but I figured my body probably needed the work out after pregnancy, labor and carrying around a nice sized baby for 4 weeks. Next time I think I'll ask for someone who isn't trying to leave bruises though.
The whole time I was getting massaged I couldn't help but think about how both my boobs hurt. Yep. And I'm not sure why. They are empty, as far as I can tell, and they hurt. I haven't been very good about taking my antibiotics and I'm scared that now I have the beginnings of mastitis in both sides. Ugh. Normally I'm the champion pill taker but as I'm sure you know (or can at least imagine) my life is a bit disorganized at the moment. My days and nights are confused and I'm just not in a routine. I also have a raging head ache that I can't seem to control with tylenol, not even the super Tylenol 3 they gave me at the hospital. What's that about? Dehydration? I've had lots of water.
The massage was great and much needed. It was firmer than I usually like but I figured my body probably needed the work out after pregnancy, labor and carrying around a nice sized baby for 4 weeks. Next time I think I'll ask for someone who isn't trying to leave bruises though.
The whole time I was getting massaged I couldn't help but think about how both my boobs hurt. Yep. And I'm not sure why. They are empty, as far as I can tell, and they hurt. I haven't been very good about taking my antibiotics and I'm scared that now I have the beginnings of mastitis in both sides. Ugh. Normally I'm the champion pill taker but as I'm sure you know (or can at least imagine) my life is a bit disorganized at the moment. My days and nights are confused and I'm just not in a routine. I also have a raging head ache that I can't seem to control with tylenol, not even the super Tylenol 3 they gave me at the hospital. What's that about? Dehydration? I've had lots of water.
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